How To Build Willpower And Self-Discipline With Stoicism

If you don't have it, you probably look at people who have it with envy. They seem exceptionally strong, having a higher force within that allows them to effortlessly conquer challenges and embrace self-discipline. With a tendency to compare ourselves with others, we feel weak and find a lot of excuses as to why our willpower and self-discipline are not strongly pronounced. I guess you know what I mean. If you're familiar with such thoughts, don't blame yourself. You're in good company.

But there's a secret. Willpower and self-discipline are not exclusive to a chosen few; they can be learned and cultivated by anyone willing to embark on this adventure. The path to willpower and self-discipline is not effortless but requires less effort than you may think.

Are you ready? Let our journey begin...

TL;DR

• Willpower is the mental strength to resist immediate gratification.
• Self-discipline is the ability to establish and maintain consistent behaviors and habits.
• Glucose, your belief, attitude, and mood can impact your willpower positively and negatively.
• Search for comfort, short-term thinking, fear of failure, unspecific goals, missing purpose, and having no plan or routines in place can weaken your self-discipline.
• With the ancient philosophy of Stoicism and modern science, you have a powerful combination to master those skills.

What Is Willpower?

The Oxford Learner's Dictionaries offers the following definition: "Willpower is the ability to control your thoughts and actions in order to achieve what you want to do."

That's pretty straightforward but also generic. So, let's dig a bit deeper. Willpower means having the ability to resist short-term temptations and delay gratification. It requires the strength to override unwanted thoughts and impulses while employing a "cool" cognitive system (rational thinking) of behavior instead of an emotional one. 

But willpower is also a limited resource that can be depleted. So, you must consciously and continuously regulate yourself to make use of your willpower.

What Is Self-Discipline?

The Oxford Learner's Dictionaries says self-discipline "is the ability to make yourself do something, especially something difficult or unpleasant." Merriam-Webster defines self-discipline as "correction or regulation of oneself for the sake of improvement."

It's also a bit generic and very similar to willpower. But there's a difference. Let's make it more tangible and easier to grasp.

Before we move on, one thing to mention. In Stoicism, self-discipline is one of the four virtues necessary to cultivate arete (an excellent character). Commonly, it's referenced as the virtue of temperance. Mastering self-discipline is something every Stoic strives for.

Willpower vs. Self-Discipline

Now, we want to bring the difference between willpower and self-discipline to life in a way we can wrap our minds around. Having a deep understanding helps us make the best use of a concept. So, let's fully understand the difference to make our adventure in mastering them as easy as a gentle breeze on a calm summer's day.

For example, willpower is used in a particular moment when you renounce sweets and choose to eat an apple instead. On the other hand, self-discipline is more long-term oriented, more structured, and helps you to deny sweets every day.

Willpower is a temporary burst of energy to resist temptations. It can help to stay disciplined. Self-discipline, on the other hand, is more about building a solid foundation of consistent actions and behaviors.

In conclusion, we can state that willpower is a tool within the framework of self-discipline.

Examples of Self-Discipline and Willpower

1. Willpower helps you to resist the urge to light a cigarette in moments of temptation or stress. Self-discipline provides the structure and determination to develop strategies to cope with cravings and replace the habit with healthier alternatives.
2. Willpower helps you resist the temptation to procrastinate. It keeps you focused on completing the tasks at hand to complete a project. Self-discipline ensures that you consistently allocate dedicated time each day to work on the project and avoid distractions.
3. Lastly, let's assume you want to save money for your dream vacation. Willpower helps you in resisting the urge to make impulsive purchases. Self-discipline goes further by helping you establish a budget, track your expenses, and consistently save a portion of your monthly income.

By now, the difference between willpower and self-discipline should be clearer. However, before we move on to developing willpower and self-discipline, there's one more crucial aspect we must grasp and fully comprehend. 

What Causes Lack Of Willpower?

When we fail to use willpower, we expose ourselves to an emotional stimulus that overrides our rational mind. As a consequence, we open the doors for impulsive actions. Therefore, we must understand what can lead willpower to fail to develop appropriate counter-strategies.

Modern research has found several factors that can lead to a depletion of willpower. While more research still has to be done, here's what science says today.¹

1. Your brain is low on fuel: Our brains need a lot of energy, and glucose (blood sugar) is an essential fuel source. Without enough glucose, our brain function can be impaired, decreasing cognitive abilities and depletion of willpower.
2. Your personal belief about willpower: The research discusses two main theories.

1. Limited theory: This theory says we only have a specific capacity for willpower. Once it's used, we can't count on your willpower anymore.
2. Not limited theory: This one says willpower is like a muscle that can be trained. Just the conviction that willpower is not easily used up is enough to exercise it more often.

1. Your attitude: When you try to use willpower to please others (extrinsic motivation), you're more likely to lack willpower. On the other hand, you become less likely to lack willpower when driven by your personal goals and values.
2. Your mood: One research has shown that maintaining a positive mood can effectively counteract willpower depletion.² So, when you're in a bad mood, you're more likely to say goodbye to your willpower.

What Causes a Lack of Self-Discipline?

When failing in self-discipline, we usually want to take the easy way out and give in to immediate gratification - we choose pleasure. Remember, self-discipline is the ability to make yourself do something for the sake of improvement. Thus, it requires effort, discomfort, and persistence.

Here are some potential reasons why we struggle with self-discipline:

1. Search for comfort instead of growth: Many of us prioritize comfort and avoid discomfort at all costs. Instead, we need to get comfortable with discomfort.
2. Short-term thinking: We often fail with self-discipline because we choose instant gratification when a temptation crosses our way.
3. Fear of failure: Sometimes, we don't even try because we fear failing. We believe we're doomed to fail, so we don't even try to be disciplined.
4. Lack of clear goals and purpose: When we know what we want to achieve, it's easier to be disciplined. Having wishy-washy goals without any purpose (the reason we want to achieve something) makes giving in to temptations way easier.
5. No planning, routines, or habits: Without a plan or daily routines and habits, we leave a vast room for distractions. Self-discipline is about consistently taking action. Without structure, it's easy to fail to be self-disciplined.

Now that we understand what causes a lack of willpower and self-discipline, we can identify potential roadblocks in our own individual journeys. Moreover, with an awareness of these factors, we can cultivate the necessary skills to master willpower and self-discipline.

How To Start Building Willpower And Self-Discipline?

As we've already learned, self-discipline (or temperance) is a Stoic virtue, and willpower is a tool to stay disciplined. So, we can use techniques and practices from the ancient Stoics to nurture these qualities and strengthen our character. Enhanced with modern science practices, you will undoubtedly soon become the master of willpower and self-discipline.

Here are 14 exercises to help you build those skills:

1. Identify Your Goals

"When a man does not know what harbour he is making for, no wind is the right wind." Seneca, Moral letters to Lucilius, Letter 71.3 On the Supreme Good

The first step is to identify your personal goals and purpose in the different areas of life. What do you aspire to achieve, and where do you seek growth? Whether you want to improve your presentation skills, excel in sports, improve your health, or refine your eating habits, it's crucial to define your goals as precisely as possible.

2. Fuel Your Engine

When your glucose level is low, and you feel your willpower is weakening, fuel your engine. Give your body a healthy dose of glucose by eating some fruit or having a snack. This will help replenish the energy needed to make rational decisions and resist temptations.

3. Breathe

As Kelly McGonigal points out in her book "The Willpower Instinct," slowing down our breath helps shift the brain and body from stress to self-control mode. Doing so for a few minutes will make us feel calm and energized to handle challenges of any sort.

4. Change Your Mood

Do you need a dose of willpower? Change your mood and do something easy that you enjoy, like listening to your favorite music or spending a few minutes in nature. A positive mood can counteract willpower depletion and give us the boost we need.

5. Write A Mantra

Stoic mantras are a great way to remind yourself of your goals and purpose you want to achieve something. Rehearse your mantra whenever you feel tempted to do something that goes against your goals or conflicts with your purpose. This will give you some time to think and adjust your behavior.

6. Make It A Game

Can you remember how easy life was when you were young? With almost no responsibilities, you had all the time to play around and explore. It was fun, wasn't it? You can replicate that feeling in your daily life by making something a game. When you have to push yourself toward something uncomfortable and challenging, try to make it fun or compete with yourself. Count how often you successfully used your willpower, and celebrate each time you succeeded. Try to increase your volume every day like bodybuilders increase their weights.

You can also reframe a situation for gamification. An unknown enemy had put something in your last drink that weakened you. The obnoxious consequence? You lack willpower and self-discipline! Now, you're a hero, and it's your goal to save the day and outsmart this enemy by being stronger than their magic potion.

7. Create Routines And Habits

"Nothing is in reality either pleasant or unpleasant by nature; but all things become such through habit." Epictetus, Fragments 7

Habits and routines are a bit like a secret sauce against willpower depletion. Once they are established, they become automatic choices you'll never question. As a consequence, you don't even need willpower. Self-discipline flourishes, and willpower is conserved. 

8. Pre-commit

This is also a huge weapon on your path to mastering self-discipline. Make your decisions ahead of time, then act accordingly! Do you want to stay in control of your finances? Leave your credit card at home and only take the money you planned to spend with you. Buy little, or best, no sweets at all when your goal is to lose weight.

Pre-commit to those actions and hold yourself accountable. Marcus Aurelius says in Meditations 2.1, "Begin the morning by saying to yourself, I shall meet with the busybody, the ungrateful, arrogant, deceitful, envious, unsocial." You can adapt this to your needs and commit yourself each morning to take the necessary actions to achieve your goals and stay self-disciplined.

9. Make Small Steps

"While all excesses are hurtful, excess of comfort is the most hurtful of all; it affects the brain; it leads men's minds into vain imaginings; it spreads a thick cloud over the boundaries of truth and falsehood." Seneca, On Providence 4

When you believe in the not-limited theory (willpower is like a muscle you can train), you can choose to use willpower actively. Each day, you can search for opportunities to increase your volume. Of course, you celebrate yourself after each successful use of willpower to make it feel good. That way, you want more and more and more of those tiny successes.

You can stand up on the train for 5 minutes when commuting to work. The next day, you stand for 6 minutes before you take a seat. The day after, it's 7 minutes. And so on and so forth. If you like coffee, renounce it for a week. Do you eat meat (sorry, sausages are also meat) daily? Then, eat meat every second day.

There are a whole bunch of tiny baby steps you can take to increase your willpower muscle. Be creative!

10. Get Enough Sleep

Have you ever experienced the energy after a power nap? Or have you ever felt how exhausting a day could be if you haven't slept well? A rested body and mind can help to replenish your energy level, making it easier to stay disciplined.

11. Create A Sense Of Jeopardy

So, you want to achieve something? You want to grow in a specific area of your life? But self-discipline and willpower don't come naturally to you? Creating a little bit of jeopardy to lift your motivation and bring out your willpower is another tool you can try. With enough practice, it can work wonders. Phil Stutz has covered it in detail in his book "The Tools."

Close your eyes and envision yourself in the distant future, lying on your deathbed. Your older you knows the importance of every moment to make your dreams come true. He screams passionately at you not to squander the present moment. You feel a profound fear that you may waste your life. This creates an urgency that ignites a fire within, compelling you to take decisive action and pursue what you know deep down is right to achieve your goals.

12. Practice Mindfulness

Mindfulness exercises help you become aware of your thoughts, emotions, and actions in the present moment. Without being mindful, chances are high that you indulge in behaviors contrary to your goals. Knowing and understanding what's happening inside helps you actively change your thoughts, correct your mindset, and, consequently, your actions.

13. Reflection

"Look within. Let neither the peculiar quality of anything nor its value escape you." Marcus Aurelius, Meditations 6.3

Reflection is one of the major Stoic exercises to shape our character. We can only learn or improve by assessing our behavior and thinking processes. Make sure to allocate time each day to reflect on the situations where you failed in executing willpower or self-discipline. Ask yourself what went wrong and where and how you can improve. Think about the moments where you have been self-disciplined and used willpower successfully. Why was it? How can you replicate it over and over again?

14. Keep A Role Model In Mind

It is the sage for Stoics, but any other role model does the same. Ask yourself how your role model would act whenever you feel tempted or weak in willpower. Would Arnold Schwarzenegger skip his gym session to eat junk food? Would Warren Buffet max out his credit card for a shopping spree? Most likely not. Keeping your personal role model in mind can be an exceptional source of inspiration and motivation to stay disciplined. 

"No great thing is created suddenly; any more than a bunch of grapes or a fig. If you tell me, that you desire a fig, I answer you, that there must be time. Let it first blossom, then bear fruit, then ripen. Since then, the fruit of a fig-tree is not brought to perfection suddenly, or in one hour; do you think to possess instantaneously and easily the fruit of the human mind? I warn you, expect it not." Epictetus, Discourses 1.14

The journey to mastering self-discipline and willpower is a lifelong adventure, not a day trip to the beach. Start with small steps and gradually increase your volume; you will soon reap the fruits of your effort.

Resources:

¹ APA

² ScienceDirect