An Emotional Resilience Booster - Learn How Neutral Thinking Can Lead to Objective Judments And Greater Freedom
"It is in our power to have no opinion about a thing, and not to be disturbed in our soul. For things themselves have no natural power to form our judgments." Marcus Aurelius, Meditations 6.52
Hi! Do you struggle with making clear decisions or figuring out how to move forward in your life? It can be overwhelming when it feels like you have no control over what's happening, right? Read on to discover how to combine the power of neutral thinking and objective judgments to gain more clarity, thus, more personal freedom and peace of mind in your daily life.
TL;DR
- Emotions can cloud our judgments and imprison us if we let them take over our decisions.
- Objective judgments are key to breaking free from our emotional chains.
- With neutral thinking, we gain clarity so that each decision can be made logically.
- A neutral mindset is like a "temperance trainer", helping us to stay balanced and not be overwhelmed by our emotions.
What is Neutral Thinking, and what are Objective Judgments?
While neutral and objective are similar, they aren't exactly the same. So, before we get started, let's examine their difference.
What is neutral?
Neutral refers to not taking sides or being biased toward one point of view over another. It means you look at an event in a balanced and unbiased way. A neutral perspective aims to provide a comprehensive overview of the topic without any influence or opinion from the presenter.
What is objective?
On the other hand, objective refers to being based on facts and evidence. It means that the information your judgment is based on is not influenced by personal beliefs, emotions, or opinions but rather based on verifiable data and logical analysis.
To sum up, both neutral and objective perspectives strive to avoid bias. Neutral thinking aims to perceive any event or situation as neutral, meaning neither positive nor negative. This kind of thinking can help arrive at objective judgments based on facts and evidence. Both are important for gaining clarity and emotional freedom regardless of your circumstances.
The Importance of correct judgments in Stoicism
"Men are disturbed not by things, but by the views which they take of things." Epictetus, Enchiridion 5
It's an essential teaching of Stoicism that people are not disturbed by things but by their judgments or opinions of those. Something occurs, and we automatically form an opinion based on what we believe is true. Why isn't assenting to our first impression of an event and creating a judgment immediately ideal? Let's dive into this and find out!
Why objective judgments are crucial for personal freedom
"Remove the judgement, and you have removed the thought 'I am hurt': remove the thought 'I am hurt', and the hurt itself is removed." Marcus Aurelius, Meditations 4.7
We are all victims of our own biases and emotions, at least to a certain point. Objective judgments can enable us to eliminate or work with them more rationally. By removing personal attachment to a given situation and relying instead on objective analysis, we can make decisions and take action free from emotional clouding. We break down the walls of our biases, gain clarity and broaden our perspective - we free ourselves from biases and initial emotions. With this kind of freedom comes peace of mind knowing that each decision has been made with well-reasoned logic rather than subjective factors.
How emotions can cloud your judgments and imprison yourself
Let's assume you're like me, an average Joe. Then you definitely had been in a situation where you let your emotions take the wheel, only to regret it later. I'm sure you have already bought an item on impulse. You saw it, felt drawn to it, and bang, you purchased it. Later you realized this wasn't a great decision; the item was too expensive, or perhaps you didn't even need it. Or maybe there was a time when you got outraged and said something hurtful or unfair to someone. Later you realized you hadn't seen the complete picture and felt so bad for your reaction. Been there, right?
You had an impression about this situation and formed a value judgment based on your rising emotions rather than looking at it neutrally and weighing all options or perspectives to conclude how you act.
"Remember that it is not he who gives abuse or blows who affronts; but the view we take of these things as insulting. When, therefore, any one provokes you, be assured that it is your own opinion which provokes you. Try, therefore, in the first place, not to be bewildered by appearances. For if you once gain time and respite, you will more easily command yourself." Epictetus, Enchiridion 20
Emotions tend to deliver a narrowed perspective and overreactions. When we judge an event as positive or negative - not rarely unconsciously - we tend to overreact. Instead of a clear sky, clouds are wavering around, clouding our vision. When we allow our emotions to supersede our rational minds, we lose a bit of our freedom. Freedom to choose how we respond. Freedom to control our message. And freedom to question our judgment.
This is why we need to train ourselves to make better decisions based on objective judgments - not our feelings or opinions.
Clearing the Emotional Fog: How Neutral Thinking Can Help Remove Bias and Improve Judgment
"Seek at once, therefore, to be able to say to every unpleasing semblance, 'You are but a semblance and by no means the real thing.' And then examine it by those rules which you have; and first and chiefly, by this: whether it concerns the things which are within our own power, or those which are not; and if it concerns anything beyond our power, be prepared to say that it is nothing to you." Epictetus, Enchiridion 1
Okay, now we know that emotions aren't the best guide for decision-making but rather tend to cloud our rational minds. As Stoics, we always want to question our first impression, prove it, consider other views, and judge whether it is good, bad, or indifferent.
And here comes neutral thinking into play. It's a way of thinking about every occurrence as neutral rather than positive or negative. Once such a mindset is established, it can become a real game-changer.
What is neutral thinking, and how can it lead to objective judgments?
"Now a man should take away not only unnecessary acts, but also unnecessary thoughts, for thus superfluous acts will not follow after." Marcus Aurelius, Meditations 4.24
Neutral thinking emphasizes non-judgmental, value-free thinking under all circumstances. Whether under stress and pressure or while experiencing a personal high, approaching situations judgment-free without giving them any value will help you to focus on the next step within your control rather than letting your emotion cloud your mind. A neutral mindset will enable you to make objective judgments more easily, leading to better decisions and outcomes. Furthermore, you become more likely to focus on what's within your control instead of complaining or allowing feelings of frustration, fear, or worry to settle down in your mind.
Let's explore two examples.
Example 1 - The Family Dinner
Let's say you're heading to a fancy dinner party where you'll meet your partner's parents for the first time. Negative thinking might sound like: "Oh no, I'm going to make a terrible first impression. They're going to hate me and think I'm not good enough for their son/daughter."
Conversely, positive thinking would sound like: "This is going to be great! I'm going to charm them with my witty banter and dazzling smile. They'll love me, and we'll become instant besties!"
The third way option, neutral thinking, sounds more like this: "Meeting the in-laws for the first time can be nerve-wracking, but I've got this. I'll dress nicely, be polite and open, and try to get to know them. I love their daughter/son; that is important. Who knows, maybe we'll have some common interests and hit it off. And worst case scenario, at least there will be something to eat!"
Example 2 - The Deadline
Now, let's say you have a big deadline coming up at work, and you're feeling the heat. Colleagues get nervous and stressed. Negative thinking might sound like: "I'm never going to get this done in time. It's impossible. I'm going to fail, and my boss is going to be so disappointed."
Positive thinking would be like: "I can do this! I'm a rockstar, and I've got this project under control. My colleagues will be amazed by my skills, and I'll get that promotion I've been dreaming of!"
The way of the neutral thinking mind sounds more like: "Okay, this deadline is coming up fast, and I'm feeling the pressure. But instead of panicking, I'm going to take a deep breath and break the project down into smaller tasks. I'll prioritize what needs to be done first and work on those tasks one by one. Wherever I need help, I'll ask for it. I'll do my best, and that's all anyone can ask of me."
How can it help to arrive at objective judgments?
Clearly, it's challenging to consider situations as neutral, especially when they are not to our liking. Whenever strong emotions are involved, humans naturally tend to judge an event immediately as positive or negative. That's exactly what we want to leave behind. Why? Because most things are not within our control, and in Stoicism, we only want to judge things within our power as good or bad.
I really want to emphasize here that it's not about approaching everything with an "I don't care" attitude or ignoring our emotions!
Seeing things neutrally enables us to focus on what we can control in the here and now instead of complaining about things we can't control anyhow. A Stoic acknowledges their emotion but doesn't let them get in the way. I mean, how crazy is it to complain about things we have no control over? How would a sailor look like who's trying to control the wind? Foolish, right? A sailor has to hold the sails; that's within their power.
"It is a ridiculous thing for a man not to fly from his own badness, which is indeed possible, but to fly from other men's badness, which is impossible." Marcus Aurelius, Meditations 7.71
With a neutral mindset, you become more open to considering different perspectives and killing negativity that drags you down. Positivity can also become dangerous when we allow these feelings to prevent us from progressing further or developing an unhealthy, selfish ego. Seeing things neutrally can help to train the virtue of temperance and bring us back down on earth.
I'm not saying you should ignore the "power of positive thinking" because it truly has value, but use positive thinking only for your own actions and accept the outcome however it will be. Avoid becoming passive through positive thinking - that's a big danger! Not "I'm so smart and lovely, I can do this", but "I'm smart and lovely and to do this, it requires XYZ. I'm not good and Z, so I ask a friend/colleague for help".
Of course, you can enjoy positive events, and it is okay to be sad for a moment when something that is not to your liking happens. But never ever stay attached to those feelings. They fade away very soon, but what's truly positive and negative lies within yourself.
How to Practice Neutral Thinking
Enough theory for now; let's discuss what you can start doing today to develop a neutral thinking mindset. So, let's take away emotion and replace it with virtuous behavior with 4 Stoic exercises.
The view from above
Try to see the event that's on your mind at the moment from different, much broader, and bigger viewpoints. Consider your issue in the context of time, space, or current world events. Visualize yourself flying higher and higher until you reach a point in space where you can look at everything quietly and from a "birds-eye view". From there, you will see your issue as part of a much larger picture, giving you the necessary distance to consider it neutrally.
Change perspectives
This is similar to the exercise above, but you put yourself in another person's shoes here. It's important to understand that the same event seen from different angles can be seen differently, too. Try to understand why someone might interpret the same event differently from you and see if your opinion changes. Writing it down can help you clear your mind. Describe the situation, context, time, etc. Then describe the people involved and try the see the event from their perspective. What were their interests or intentions?
Question your judgments
Questioning your judgments is a reflective exercise that involves breaking down your judgments and assumptions to arrive at a more objective viewpoint. By working backward from your initial judgments, you can identify the underlying emotions, beliefs, and biases that may cloud your thinking.
For example, let's say you have a colleague who always seems to be negative and critical of your work. Your initial judgment might be something like, "They're just being mean and trying to tear me down." But if you question your judgment, you might ask yourself, "Why do I think they're being mean?" This leads you to question two, "What evidence do I have to support this belief?" You might realize that you don't actually have any concrete evidence that your colleague is being mean - it's just a feeling you have.
From there, you can move on to question three: "What is another possible explanation for this situation?" Your colleague may be struggling with personal issues, and their negativity has nothing to do with you. You can arrive at a more neutral and objective perspective by challenging your initial judgment and digging deeper into the situation.
You can also try to use the "5 Whys" technique. Ask "why" five times to get to the root cause of your judgment. This can help you avoid making assumptions and identify the trustworthy source of an issue.
Stay open-minded
Neutral thinking requires a willingness to consider multiple perspectives and possibilities. Instead of assuming your way is the only way, try to be open to new ideas and approaches. This can lead to more creative problem-solving and greater empathy for others.
With these exercises, you can create your own personal emotional resilience booster by combining neutral thinking and objective judgments. Think of it like spinach for Popeye!
Of course, building a neutral thinking mindset takes time and practice. But today, the times of hasty and impulsive decisions and reactions are over. Sign up to Stoic Buddy and start practicing a neutral mindset.
